4/12/26

No Spirals, Just Direction

Staying grounded without falling down

This is what’s true for me.
Take what helps you.

I’m not denying reality.
And I’m not spiraling either.

My reality is this: I have stage four cancer.
That is true.

But what I do next with that truth—that part matters.

Because I’ve learned something over time.
Spiraling doesn’t help me. It doesn’t align with who I am or how I want to live.
So I don’t practice it.

Instead, I use a simple way to stay grounded and keep moving forward.

Not perfectly. Just intentionally.

The Difference

Spiraling, for me, looks like this:
Taking in too much information
Mixing fear with facts
Letting my mind run without direction

It’s overwhelming. And it doesn’t lead anywhere I want to go.

So I do something different.

What I Do Instead

I steer.

1. Filter
I don’t take in everything.
Not every story. Not every opinion. Not every worst-case scenario.

I’ve done this for years. Even when I was pregnant, I would tell people,
“I appreciate the offer, but I’m only accepting good stories right now.”

That still applies.

2. Sort
I separate what I’m learning into two things:

Data and destiny.

Data is what exists.
Medical facts. Studies. outcomes.

Destiny is what it means for me.

Those are not the same thing.

3. Choose
I decide what I allow to stay in my mind.

If something pulls me down without helping me move forward,
I don’t give it space.

4. Act
I ask myself:
What part of this is mine?

That’s where I focus.

For me right now, that looks like: Taking care of my body
Making better food choices
Juicing
Moving when I can
Continuing my projects
Creating, writing, singing

Living.

5. Release
There are parts of this I don’t control.

For me, that’s where my faith comes in.
I trust God with what I can’t carry.

If faith isn’t your framework, this can still apply:
Not everything is yours to solve today.

In the Moment Itself

When I feel the pull to spiral, I come back to this:

Name
What is true right now?

Notice
This is the pull. This is the spiral.

Choose
What direction do I want to go?

Pull Forward
Not a leap. Just a reach.

A thought.
A prayer.
A next step.
A question.
A memory.

Sometimes, I go back to my list.
The things that matter most.
The birthdays I don’t want to miss.
The people I love.
The work I still feel called to do.

That’s what I reach for.

What This Looks Like for Me

I’m not ignoring the hard parts.

I know this isn’t curable.

And at the same time, I also know this:

I’ve been given more time than I once expected.
And I’ve used it.
And I’m going to keep using it.

I’m still creating.
Still building.
Still loving.
Still showing up.

Because I don’t control what happens.

But I do control who I become through it.

For You

You don’t have to do this the way I do.

But you also don’t have to spiral.

You can: Filter
Sort
Choose
Act
Release

You can stay grounded
Without falling down

And you can take one step forward
Even here

This is what’s true for me.
Take what helps you.